有时候

有時候就是想大哭一場 因為心受委屈 有時候就是想瘋癲一下 因為情緒低落 有時候就是想破口大罵 因為心裡不爽 有時候就想安安靜靜的 因為真的我累了

negative hormones here

It's 1st of December, third semester is coming to an end. Living so rush, stress, pressure, down for this semester. Yes, negative feelings are more than the positive ones. I am not a negative person but I am turning. God, someone please pull me back. I always feels afraid when people ask me, what you wanna be in the future? I feel ashame, nervous, sad when I have to answer you. Because me, myself, are feeling blur too. I couldn't see a clear way of mine, how I wanna answer you. That really gives a lot pressure on me. And I started to answer animator because I don't want to talk much, lazy to explain, or I have nothing to explain. I am an easily cry people, I couldn't control my tears when my body gonna break to tears, teach me to control my tears, teach me to control and remain a stony face. But, sometimes... sometimes... tears, for me, is a way releasing my emotions, pulling out the stress from my body, the unhappy and negative cells and hormones which staying inside my body. I know the world is cruel out there, tears just get things worse when we are working out there. I will learn to be tougher, not crying in front of people, just rolling tears during the night when I'm alone with my pillow. My body needs laughter as much as it needs tears. Both are cleansers of stress.

到了一定的年紀 有了太多的心事 人就會變得沉默

放下

当我能做到把该放下的 都放下的時候 不是因为突然舍得了 而是因为任性夠了、该成熟了 也知道该跨越往前了

When I turn 21

I feel nervous. Maybe I am the weird one. Everyone feels happy when they turns 21, because that is the time they will be the 'so called' officially adult. Only me, maybe, only me, feeling, nervous. The turning of age of 21 means we are officially an adult, act like an adult, live like an adult, everything like an adult. Life's stepping to another level.. slowly.. I don't feel any 'adultness' on me, feeling so bad of myself, not matured enough, doesn't own any ability , capability.. all negative feelings and thought, feels afraid to my future. I desperately wish to grow faster to turn as an adult when I was a kid, but it changed when I am growing to be an adult. I think my friends wouldn't know all of my negative feelings on me since I'm always hanging a happy face. No birthday party is fine, I love the simple and quiet way. But, feeling a bit sad is I'm not celebrating it with my family since I'm studying miles away from my home. 27th November 12.01am, in the hostel, a cake, a surprise celebration with the 5 housemates. Another course mate bought me a cake too after class on my birthday. A big thanks, it really feels warm. And all the warm and precious wishes from lovely people. Appreciate. The day I turn 21. Peacefully.

可怕的演出

假面的和蔼可亲， 对我来说很可怕。 所以，别演， 我没兴趣。 所以，别装，我不稀罕。 所以，请离开。 要不，我也会自行离席。 在演出还没结束以前。

聚

Finally! Met up with da lovelies primary friends on Sit Rong's bufday partiee. Sit Rong, our monitor and the craziest friend since young till now! Haha!
So, I met up

Xue Theng, a fashionable girl for me, I like every of her dressup, still as pretty as she always do ;

Jia Lin, an active girl, white, skinny, pretty girl ;

Jia Hui, blissful girl with her boyfiee, mature pretty lady ;

Chris, sometimes I still calling him Derek in my mind, haha, friendly handsome guy ;

Moo, a very good and nice buddy, he's like a very good person to talk, to share every happy or sad things in your life , *as a friend ;

Edward, handsome and sometimes I just found him preeeettiee haha, humor guy ;

and knew 3 new friends, their secondary mates!
En Qian (she's damn skinny and white!!) , Foo and Yao Han (:

Back to party, feeling pleased, Sit Rong is so happy with her party, I truly wish that she'll be happy always.

21岁嘛, 一定会有红酒, sparkling juice 啦。。一直好忙的寿星拿来了几支 wine 给待到最后的我们, 还说要我们喝完它。拿来了一个杯, 有点醉意的 Rong 看着我们一个一个轮流喝, 谁也不能  miss, 哈哈。我还想说, 生日高兴嘛, 就试看喝 (虽然 I'm not good in drinking hehe) ,
结果轮到我时, 我可爱体贴的朋友们赶紧喊说 :
秀仪不可以喝~!  秀仪不可以喝~!
哈哈, 有点醉意的 Rong 也点点头说 NEXT. Haha

看着她那么开心的度过自己的 21 岁, 也开始幻想自己的 21 岁会怎样度过, 确切来说, 会有谁一起度过吧, 住在心里好久的谁, 可是, 好像是不可能发生的事, 呵呵。

生日快乐
晚安

去听一场喜欢的人的演唱会

This is one of my dream list! (=

没想到, 跟o, m, k and bro yumcha 时, m 竟然说想听 Linkin park 的演唱会, 这么刚巧Linkin park August 在 KL 有场 concert 呢! (= Linkin park 耶~ 一定很赞啦, 搞得我也心痒痒的。 hahah xD

我其实还没决定该听谁的 concert?
21生日(今年)去 还是30岁? 哈
跟爸妈听蔡琴的?
还是 跟心里住了很久的那位去? 哈
*开始发梦了,呵呵, 最后那个应该是永远都不会发生的事吧

亲爱的路过的你,
去听一场现场演唱会吧!
你会发现, 那种感觉与你从手机和电脑里听歌, 是完全不同的感受。

愿你有个美好的一天 ♥

穿棉麻衣的人, 不需要取悦任何人

喜欢棉麻衣的人,都有一个共同的特点，
就是: 崇尚简单，纯朴，自然的生活和品质。

喜欢棉麻衣的女人, 淡然, 温柔, 素雅, 安静。
喜欢棉麻衣的男人, 无争, 宽容, 干净, 自由。

有时间的人

做个有时间的穷人, 也不要做有钱的忙人。